Debbie Magids, Ph.D.

It’s hard to meet men, let alone a good man, so when you find someone you connect with and hormones fly, it’s easy to lose direction and difficult to know whether he’s a prince or player.

By definition, a prince is the nice guy who you probably rejected when you were sixteen — the keeper — the one interested in marriage and who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. The player, on the other hand, is the boy you lusted over in high school. He’s the one who’s suave and sexy and knows it. He’s the one with all the right moves, none of them putting your interests first. And yet, he’s so very attractive. Here are six features that will help you tell a prince from a player.

1. A prince calls when he says he will. A player has a long list of excuses as to why he couldn’t call.



2. A prince puts you first. A player puts everything but you first — work, golf, drinking, friends, you name it.



3. A prince wants to meet your family and friends and wants you to meet his (when he sees the relationship is moving forward). A player may take you out with his friends (or bring his friends along on your date, depending how you view it), even on the first date. Consider this a clear sign that dating you has little to do with building a relationship. As for family, don’t plan on meeting them.



4. A prince invests time in you — taking time to find out your favourite song, dessert, etc., a sign of his falling for you. A player puts forth little effort to really get to know you.



5. A prince is the one who will hand-deliver chicken soup when you’re sick. A player is the one who will be way too busy to see you when you’re sick because it won’t be any fun for him.



6. A prince will romance you slowly, bringing you a single flower or bouquet when the time is right, sending a romantic card, or going someplace fancy for dinner to celebrate something special. A player will romance you in a blaze of extravagance — with dozens of the most expensive bouquets “just because,” going to the most expensive restaurants from the beginning, and other similar extravagances. He’s basically looking for a quick payoff.

Beware: If it seems too good to be true, it probably is! If you’re caught up in a whirlwind romance, remember, tornadoes sweep in, wreak havoc, and disappear as quickly as they came. Slow and steady really does win the race!

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Visit Debbie Magids, Ph.D. at www.drdebbiemagids.com.